Thursday, January 21, 2010

CRACK WIDOW 2007

Once I was in love and soared through the heavens. He was my lover and my best friend for eight years. Life wasn't perfect but it was adventurous and fullfilling. My Love was stolen from me by the devil of all drugs. My heart bounds me to this weary planet where I mourn the loss of my love. Although he is still living, he is the walking dead. Seeing him on the street makes me cry remembering the man he used to be. Listening to my daughter cry for her father breaks my heart, knowing that I am not only denying myself I am also denying her the love we both long for. He cannot see past his own wants and needs. He cannot hear the pleas from his family, his friends, or me to get the help he needs to come back to us. He is addicted to the devil of all drugs and the man he was he is no more.

I want to soar the heavens again. I'm afraid there is no one who can help me until I have found my release from the grief that binds me here. I'm afraid that day will never come.
I dont know how to let go of my love for the man he was or my sorrow for the man he now is.
I am a crack widow.