save us

 If you every loved me

tell me

If you want to save us 

help me

All i know

 is I broke when you turned to walk away

 i couldnt let you go

 now i need to hear you say

What i want to know

 That your heart is in this with mine all the way

Is it possible to show

 no one else matters & we are here to stay.

I need to know

From this point forward where do we go

We cant ignore what brought us close to losing it all

I need to know

 from this point forward how does our love grow

love me, help me rebuild our faith in us so high we never ever fall

If you ever loved me

Tell me

If you want to save us

Help me

Little Red Flags

 

Destiny shows us who is and who is not supposed to be

Starting with the little red flags popping up before me

But my stubborness and pride pretend not to or refuse to see

I ignore the warnings of the little reg flags sent to me by destiny

Destiny doesnt stop revealing why you should let certain people go.

 The little red flag warnings are harder to ignore as the fury to show you the warnings grow

But my naiveté or my ignorance tells myself I can handle dealing with what I already know

 So no matter how big the little red flags get I am blinded by spirit of my boldness or ego

Destiny continues to send warnings and the little red flags are now waving in my face

My eyes are finally open and my heart is broken from shameful disgrace

I am embarrassed that I failed to see or refused to learn from the past that I embrace

Thankful for Persistance of Destiny to save me from myself and to find my safe place. 

Destiny and the little red flags are really your best friend

Always looking out for you and work together to defend

I have learned to listen and watch carefully for every little warning they send

This is so I can tell which relationships to keep and which I should end.

I've never really been in love 4/23/21

I've never really been in love, I don't think. 

I've only ever been a seeker acceptance. I need a Shrink.

I give up myself to make others feel Happy .

That is not love,  and it just feels real crappy. 

 I let myself deconstruct to make someone else feel secure

It never works anyway and I find myself more unsure.

Honestly, I do not know what is true loyalty

I just know I treat every one I've been with like royalty.

How can you feel or give what you have never had?

Seems demanding it is meaningless and  that's really sad.

I ponder these thoughts of myself in vain

Some of us need to thoroughly explore our pain

It is only when these thoughts fail to produce lingering strife

One such as me can move on to live a productive life.

Bold Heart 4/17/2020

I will not go gentle into the forever night

I will not miss another mornings light

I have fearless strength and a soul on fire

If I am ever down only I can lift myself higher

Learning from the past is something I do well

Letting go is hard as the memories make tears swell

But don't ever count this bold heart out

Do not ever feed into my self doubt

I am emboldened by the beauty you cannot see

I am emblazoned by the beauty that is me

Where is she? 8/23/20

Where is she?

Here, but lost in reality.

Pain wont let her go

All her happiness is just for show.

Everyone tries to help because they think they know how her life should be

No one really knows because no one else is Me. 

Feng Shui 10/9/2020

You Good?

Yah, you good.

Fuck what all the players say

I don't have to play to be ok.

Light and love in Pink for my soul,

 Feng Shui. 

Missing Pieces 10/19/2020

A puzzle

With missing pieces

surviving through life 

but no longer whole

Kind of like the walking dead with no soul.